Memories
by insanitys.cowgirl
Summary: Whilst on a mission in the arctic, Steve cannot put a lid on the overflow of painful memories, and has to turn to Tony for help.


**I just kind of started writing on this one and it came to life on it's own. So...sorry if it sucks, but this just kind of appeared on my canvas today. Anyway, I don't own Marvel or the Avengers.**

Steve felt the cold water envelop him as he fell, and his heart nearly stopped. Not this again. His skin burned from the cold everywhere the water touched it, and his lunges soon began screaming for air. Unable to react, the super soldier sunk further into the water's icy embrace. It was dark, and cold and just brought up too many memories. It all came back in a rush, everything he'd been trying to push aside since he'd woken up. Peggy. Bucky. The train. Red Skull. His crash into the icy ocean. He couldn't stop the flood of images from invading his mind. Couldn't think of anything else.

He barely registered the hand that clasped around his wrist, tugging him upwards, still lost in the past. Tony dragged him upwards, grumbling to J.A.R.V.I.S and himself about useless 40s supersoldiers, and finally their heads popped above the surface. The other Avengers gave silent cheers as they saw Tony pull Steve to the surface, tugging the larger man against his chest and taking off. He held Steve tight as he flew over the expanse of freezing ocean, landing on shore and reaching out for the thick blanket Natasha offered. He wrapped the fabric around Steve's shoulders, securing it in front of his chest and clasping the soldier's own hands around it. Steve shivered uncontrollably, and looked up at Tony.

_Howard! _Steve almost exclaimed. _Man am I glad to see you!. _Then Steve looked again. And realized something. It wasn't Howard. Tony. _Tony. _With his mind wavering between the past and the present Steve did the only thing he could think of. He lunged upwards and locked his arms around Tony's neck, burrying his face in the other man's metal clad shoulder as he shook uncontrolably. Tony's eyes widened in shock and he just stood there for a moment, before draping his own arms around Steve, replacing the blanket, and slowly lowering them to the ground. Steve curled closer to him and Tony snapped his mask open.

"You guys get going, I'll take care of Capsicle." Tony said, rubbing Steve's back awkwardly.

"Alright. AVENGERS, WITH ME!" Thor hollered, taking Steve's place as leader. The other superheroes went back to their fight without a complaint. On the one hand, a few were jealous that Tony was getting out of the fight, but on the other none of them wanted to deal with an emotional Steve Rogers. And somebody had to do it.

"Hey, how're ya doin' there Spangles?" Tony asked, trying to pry Steve off of him. Steve looked up at him, big blue eyes watery, and it was Tony's undoing. The man just looked so pitiful.

"I'm taking Steve back to the tower." Tony announced into his comm.

"Good idea, Man of Iron." Thor agreed.

"We've got things here." Clint agreed.

"See ya back there, guys." Tony said. He stood slowly, pulling Steve with him. "Alright big guy, feet on mine, just like that, and hold on tight." Steve complied, gripping at Tony's waist with one strong arm, the other wrapped tightly around Tony's shoulders as they took off. Tony took it slow, switching between using both of his arms to stabalize their flight, and wrapping one around Steve to give the soldier more support. Steve was nervous, almost not trusting his comrade not to drop him, and clung on tightly the whole way, watching the ground with deer-in-headlight eyes.

Tony brought them down gently, and Steve climbed off, silently breathing a sigh of relief, even as he still shivered on the edge of hypothermia. J.A.R.V.I.S stripped Tony of his suit and Tony guestured to the tower.

"Let's go inside, Cap. I think you have some spare clothes here, so you can get out of that soaked suit." Tony said. "Let's go." He insisted, placing a guiding hand on Steve's back when he didn't respond, still pretty out of it.

"Go on, get changed." Tony instructed, shoving Steve into a bathroom. "I'll be in the kitchen."

When Steve meandered into the kitchen a few moments later, he was changed, and a towel hung loosely over his neck, but his hair was still sopping wet.

"Dry you hair, I don't care if you are a super soldier, you'll catch a cold." Tony instructed. God, he sounded like such a mother hen. "Plus, I don't need you dripping water onto my carpet." He added some snark for normality's sake. Steve half-heartedly drug the towel over his head before spacing out again.

"C'mon. I'm not gonna do it for you." Tony said, but when Steve still made no move to dry himself off, Tony took ahold of the towel and began to dry Steve hair, giving the larger man a look that clearly said: I cannot believe I'm actually doing this.

"Alright, out with it." Tony said, sitting down across the bar from Steve and pushing a glass of brandy in front of the soldier. "What's eatin' ya?"

"I can't get drunk." Steve said sadly, pushing the glass back to Tony.

"It'll warm you up." Tony countered, pushing the glass stubornly back to Steve. Steve gave in and drank it, finding Tony to be right. The slight burn of the alcohol warmed him a bit.

"So, tell me." Tony persisted once more. "What's bugging you, I mean." He poured himself a glass of whatever was closest and prepaired to give Steve his undivided attention. Steve stood up and walked over to one of the plush leather couches, plopping down on it uncerimoniously. Tony followed, sitting down next to the larger man and watching him curiously.

"Just...memories." Steve sighed sadly, studying his hands intently, but refusing to look up at Tony.

"Yeah? Tell me." Tony said, propping his feet on the coffee table and draping his arm over the back of the couch.

"You don't wanna hear my sob story." Steve said.

"Sure I do." Tony insisted.

"Alright. But remember," Steve said, "you asked for it." Tony nodded solemnly-or, as solemnly as Tony Stark could-and Steve began. He started by telling Tony all about the infusion, how he went from a tiny astchmatic to a super soldier in minutes. Then he moved on to Peggy, and he must have gone on for hours about her. How perfect she was. How beautiful she was. Her strength. Her kindness. Her mean streak. Somewhere in his rant, Steve had taken Tony's open posture as an invite, and laid his back against Tony's chest. For reasons unbeknownst to Tony, he didn't protest. Steve went on to tell about his fight against Hydra, the night on the train. And finally, his crash into the ocean.

"I guess, falling into the Arctic ocean like that today just brought it all back. The cold water reminded me so much of the day I crashed, and...it was like opening a flood gate. I couldn't stop the images in my head, and believe me, I wanted to." Steve murmured quietly.

"I know what you mean, buddy." Tony said, knocking back another glass of alcohol. Whatever alcohol he'd grabbed on his way to the couch, scotch, perhaps? No, whiskey.

"Your turn." Steve said suddenly.

"What?"

"What's your story." Steve persisted. "It's only fair, I told you mine."

Maybe the alcohol was clouding his judgement, or maybe he just agreed with Steve, but before too long Tony found himself pouring out his life story to Steve. The way he grew up, his mother's death, the way his father treated him, how he was kidnapped, and even Obidiah's betrayal. Steve hummed queitly in genuine sympathy, rubbing soft circles on the back of Tony's hand, which had moved from the back of the couch to rest on Steve's leg. And even though Tony didn't do emotions, he found himself enjoying the talk.

And finally they had talked themselves out and Steve just rested against Tony's chest, the pair having shifted to a more comfortable position, with Steve between Tony's knees and Tony's back against the arm of the couch. Steve let his eyes drift closed as Tony couldn't resist the urge to straighten Steve's hair anymore, and a warm hand flitted around Steve's face with gentle touches.

"Hey Cap, look here for a sec." Tony asked. Upon his word, Steve turned in his arms and Tony was met with those baby blues. Not giving himself time to rethink, Tony dove forward for a kiss. Remembering Steve's inexperience, Tony kept it gentle, his own lips brushing against Steve's and waiting for the soldier to repsond on his own time.

_This is wrong. _A small voice in the back of Steve's head whispered. Steve ignored it. Sure, homosexuality had been frowned upon in his time, but this was the twenty-first century. Besides, this was _Tony_. He kissed back, sealing his lips to Tony's. Tony's hand came up to cup Steve's jaw and draw him deeper into the kiss. Tony kissed Steve senseless, only allowing the other man to break away when air was no longer an option. Those blue eyes were sparkling, not with tears this time, but with open affection. And Tony, if just for the moment, let his guard down, allowing Steve to find the same affection shining in his own eyes.

After a word-less exchange of _I love you_s, Steve turned back in Tony's arms, settling down against the smaller man's chest again, and Tony turned the TV on, snaking his arms around _his_ super soldier.

The rest of the Avengers arrived home to a truly adorable sight. Somewhere in the evening, Tony and Steve had drifted off to sleep. Steve had rolled over so that his cheek was smushed against Tony's chest, and Tony had his arms wrapped around the larger man's shoulders, securing him there. Bruce smiled, setting Cap's shield, which Hulk had been kind enough to recover, on the coffee table, and draping the blanket that was on the back of the couch over the sleeping pair.

With a few glances in the dozing couple's direction, the other superheroes tiptoed away to their own respective rooms to get some much needed rest.


End file.
